Response-Able to Me – (by featured client Shelby)

Posted on September 1, 2009 by


Shelby & Friend

Shelby & Friend

The current economic crunch has affected our country in a critical way and it’s been a tough year for many of us.  My personal journey through this economic climate has lead me to a profound realization.  If I really want to improve my situation, I can work on the one thing over which I have control…….myself.

In Stephen Covey’s book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, he talks about how our behavior is a function of our decisions, not our conditions.  We can subordinate feelings to values.  We have the initiative and the responsibility to make things happen.

Look at the word responsibility — “response – ability” — the ability to choose your response.  Highly proactive people recognize that responsibility.  They do not blame circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior.  Their behavior is a product of their own conscious choice, based on values, rather than a product of their conditions based on feeling.

Because we are, by nature, proactive, if our lives are a function of conditioning and conditions, it is because we have, by conscious decision or by default, chosen to empower those things to control us.

In making such a choice, we become reactive.  Reactive people are often affected by their physical environment.  If the weather is good, they feel good.  If it isn’t, it affects their attitude and their performance.  Proactive people can carry their own weather with them.  Whether it rains or shines makes no difference to them.  They are value driven; and if their value is to produce good quality work, it isn’t a function of whether the weather is conducive to it or not.

It’s not what happens to us, but our response to what happens to us that hurts us.  Of course, things can hurt us physically or economically and can cause sorrow.  But our character, our basic identity, does not have to be hurt at all.  In fact, our most difficult experiences become the crucibles that forge our character and develop the internal powers, the freedom to handle difficult circumstances in the future and to inspire others to do so as well.

As members of the Genesis Family, players in the “transformation” process, we are faced with the reality of the current circumstance and future projections.  But we must also face the reality that we have the power to choose a positive response to those circumstances and projections.  If we do not, we accept the idea that what’s happening in our environment has to determine us.

As a transforming community we can be proactive.  We do not have to be at the mercy of the environment; let’s take the initiative to accomplish the shared values and purposes of the individuals involved.  Let’s create a proactive culture within the organization!

We are responsible for our own effectiveness, for our own happiness, and ultimately, I would say, for most of our circumstances.

I shudder to think where I would be today if I had not embarked on this program when I did (February 2008).  Lately, I’ve been thinking about how much change and stress I have dealt with this past year and a half.  I consider what kind of a toll it would have taken on my health if I had not been in this program…..I wonder if I would even still be here right now.  I have heard my Genesis coach say; “People usually do this only when the time is right for them”…..I BELIEVE.

Samuel Johnson observed: “The fountain of content must spring up in the mind, and he who hath so little knowledge of human nature as to seek happiness by changing anything but his own disposition,  will waste his life in fruitless efforts and multiply the grief he proposes to remove.”

Knowing that we are responsible — “response – able” — is fundamental to effectiveness.  Hang in there; we are all in this




Respectfully, Shelby Nash Hunter

“No one can hurt you without your consent.”

Eleanor Roosevelt

In the words of Gandhi, “They cannot take away our self respect if we do not give it to them.”  It is our willing permission, our consent to what happens to us, that hurts us far more than what happens to us in the first place.

Thank you Jamie & Samantha….Two Beautiful Hearts….I love you more than words can say.

Posted in: Client Stories