Stacie’s Journey: July 2012

When I spoke to Courtney this week, I told her that I struggled every month with writing about my journey.  I said that I really didn’t know what I was supposed to write.  Her reply really opened my eyes and made this part of the journey much easier.  She said, “You aren’t supposed to write anything.  This is for you, not anyone else.”  Basically, I am writing this for my own journey and if it helps anyone else to read it, so much the better.  So, this month I am going to put down in writing the reasons why I am writing about my journey.  First, I am writing for personal accountability.  It is really hard to lie to yourself when you actually write it out.  I will know if I am full of crap or not, even if no one else does.  Also, when I say I will do it and I don’t, it is immediately known.  I have either written it and sent it to Courtney, or I haven’t.  Second, I can look back and see what kind of struggles I have dealt with and what I learned from them.  It will help me to remember that whatever I am dealing with will have an end and I can look forward to the other side and not give up.  Third, if someone else reads it and has advice or encouragement to give, they can.  It is hard for me to get nuggets of wisdom from the other folks who have been through what I am going through or are going through it now, if I don’t communicate in a way that they can see it.

I really need to be aware of what I am thinking about myself.  This month, I realized that I had stopped visualizing what I will look/be like when I reach my goal.  One way I plan to address this is to find some old pictures from when I was in the best shape of my life and pull them out to see.  My assignment for myself is to make a vision board so I know what I am working toward.  Those times that I am tempted to eat poo, I can look at that board and decide if it helps me to meet that goal or to move away from it.  I really think it will be helpful to have a visual reminder and not just a mental picture.