Lisa Discovers Delicious Living!

Posted on October 3, 2010 by

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I’ve already written a little bit about what got me into my health predicament, and how GT helped me regain my health and fitness.  However, I only brushed the surface of how having my health and fitness back has broadened my life experience and as a result, allowed such happiness in my everyday life.
The most significant change in my life is my confidence – I got it back.  Having (or not having) confidence in myself impacts every thought, and every action in my day, whether I realize it at that very moment or not.  It broadens my dreams and the number of courses my life path might take.  It emboldens my pursuit of new friendships and experiences.  It changes the impact that I allow others to have on my moods and perception of myself.  Before I gained all of my weight, I walked through the world as if I were confident, but in reality, it was all just one very long performance for the benefit of the people around me.  After all, isn’t it common knowledge that if you act confident, people will believe that you are?  Now that I’m all wise and emotionally whole and stuff, I feel that self-confidence is really just self-love.  Being able to love myself despite all of my little quirks and flaws is the greatest gift that I’ve ever given myself.

Everything else that I’ve gained from my GT experience and new healthy, lean, fit body is a bit of a byproduct of that self-love.  As my boss (of all people!) recently commented, I have a vibrancy about me that I didn’t have when I was hauling around an extra 125 pounds of fat and two tons of self-loathing.    I laugh more easily, and smile – a lot.  I anticipate that good things will happen in my life.   I think my joyful soul has always been with me, but that it was just buried beneath the burden of extra weight and the shame that accompanied it.
So how has my journey impacted my life in other ways?  Don’t even get me started on how fun it is to go clothes shopping!  An activity that I used to loathe and would depress me beyond words is now fun – really fun!  What a bonus that I have to buy yet another new wardrobe for this fall and winter!  While I used to not care what I looked like when going to work, or running errands, I now take pride in my appearance and always try to look my best.  After all, how I present myself to the world is a reflection of how I feel about myself on the inside, and I want everyone I encounter to notice how truly happy I am, because maybe it will get them wondering – why is she so stinking happy and smiling at everybody?!  While it’s a little like being the only one in on the joke, which is in and of itself kinda fun, maybe just one person will reflect on their own life and make a little change that will bring them more happiness too.

A natural part of having a fit body is all of the physical activities that I can (and do!) enjoy.  Last winter was the first time I’d downhill skied in 8 years, because I’d discovered that skiing was really hard when I was overweight, and I was terrified by the idea that I would fall and not have the strength to get my fat butt standing again.  Just the idea of it was so mortifying that I stayed off the hills.  Now I have pretty new skis and boots (hmmm – maybe I need new pants too?!), and am looking forward to long days on Big Mountain again this winter.  I’ve also recently discovered the freedom of running outdoors – it is so much more interesting than running on the treadmill in the gym – checking out houses in town, listening to the leaves and grasses rustle in the country.  Hiking has returned to my list of ‘for fun’ activities and I’m hoping to brush off the backpack for some backcountry overnights as well.  Not only have I re-introduced myself to activities that I used to love, but I’ve added a new one as well – whitewater rafting.   Inflatable kayaks and whitewater canoeing have also been added to my repertoire. When I was younger I used to go on half day commercial trips, but now I’m learning to row a cataraft.  Just me.  I recently went on a 7 day trip down the Salmon River, and rowed a raft loaded with 1,000 pounds of gear, two people, and two dogs.  Nice core and upper body workout!!  It was a lot of work, and by far the best vacation of my life.
One last (best?) thing that my transformation has made possible – boys.  Ok, ok, men.  Although I’ve never been married, up until I gained weight I’d had several long (and not so long!) term relationships, but I think I was lacking that self-love and self-respect necessary to make them healthy relationships.  Once I’d gained weight, I was overwhelmed with self-loathing, and had no desire to date anyone.  After all, if I couldn’t stand the sight of myself, and therefore couldn’t love myself, how could anyone else?  Now I’ve met a great guy who’s fit, active, and intrigued by and supportive of my lifestyle.  We’re good friends and having a blast.  While I don’t know how it will turn out, I can say that thanks to my GT journey, I have the confidence and self-respect to make certain that any relationship I choose is a healthy one.
The changes in my day-to-day life, and my entire outlook on life, have changed so dramatically that I can barely recognize the ‘old’ me.  Was that really me?  While it was how I looked, and it was the life I was living, I would argue that no, that wasn’t me.  However, the incongruence between the life I was living, and the person I really am, fed my unhappiness and anxiety.   While I’m not suddenly perfect in this respect, I do think that having brought my daily life in line with the essence of who I am has helped bring me unimaginable joy – every day.  How cool is that?!

Lisa Before

Lisa After

Lisa and Sheri Lynn

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