Kelly’s Journey – October 2014

For three plus years I resisted meditation.  I thought it was crazy that someone could sit and breathe and it would have any effect.  I tried a few times, started a few 21 or 40 day sessions but quit after a few days because this “zen” feeling I waited for never happened.  I was right, this stuff didn’t work!

Onward I went through the days doing my thing.  I was eating clean and taking good care of myself, I’m doing fine even if I don’t meditate.  Now and then I would hear about the peace and calm friends experienced from meditation and I wondered how they made it work and how they managed to get a benefit.  Hmmm, it’s just not my thing I guess.

Over the last couple of months my chats with my coach began to take on more of a tone of well being.  I enjoyed that, it helped me slow down and get through those times of stress we all feel now and then.  I began to realize that after all the work I’d done with the weight loss and eating right I also needed to work on the thought process as well.

So once again I tried this meditation thing, except this time it was different.  I decided I’d just sit quiet for a few minutes.  I wasn’t going to do any chanting or anything, just focus on my breathing.  My mind raced with crazy off the wall thoughts like grocery lists, painting my kitchen, and other nonsense.  Every time I found myself get off track I’d just refocus on my breathing. Five minutes turned into seven and then ten.  I was doing every other day, mostly because I didn’t want to commit.

I told my coach on our next call that I just felt things went smoother on the days I sat and I had broken sleep and more stress on days I didn’t.  Hmmm, maybe this does work.  I began to realize that it wasn’t what happened while I was meditating “the zen thing”, rather it’s what would happen (or not happen) after I meditated.

So for me meditation is just sitting quiet for a time and breathing. Yes I still have noisy thoughts pop up but each day it gets easier to push them aside and focus on my breathing. What a difference it has made.  Last week I got in 6 of 7 days and on the day I missed I did not sleep well, woke up at 2:30 am wide awake and thinking about junk.  Nah, that’s not for me….I’d rather sit and breathe.

Kelly